Short timer

When I arrived in Anchorage in late June, it was only a week after the summer solstice. The days were longer than long, and the vegetation was in full bloom. I especially liked the Cow Parsnip (aka Pushki; Heracleum maximum Bartram) that lined the trails.

Yesterday, I went for what was going to be my last ride before heading back to the Old Pueblo. Here, in late August, with the days still long but getting steadily shorter, the Pushki is on the wane. I can't help but to see this as a metaphor for the time I've spent up here, and the fact that it's coming to an end.

I learned today that Pushki can cause severe skin reactions. I hadn't known this, and I'm glad I didn't have any issues. On the other hand, I don't doubt I would have eventually become sensitized. To stretch the botanical metaphor a bit further, this lack of basic knowledge about Alaska - and the potential consequences of that naiveté - represents the reason why I probably shouldn't live here. And I actually could have. I was offered a permanent transfer right into the job I've been up here doing temporarily. With a word, I could have left my work frustrations in Tucson behind and embarked on a new life in the Last Frontier. After nine years of fruitless job hunting, I was sorely tempted. It kept me up late at night, thinking about it. But there was just too much I didn't know.

I didn't know if the new job would be worth uprooting everything for. I didn't know if I could handle the cold and snow and ice and darkness of winters so close to the arctic. I didn't know if I'd ever be able to get transferred back to the Lower 48 - much less Tucson - if things didn't go well. Most of all, I didn't know if I could actually leave my beloved Sonoran Desert. And so, I reluctantly declined the first opportunity I've had in years, ensuring my return to a place I know I love but also to a job that I don't like. 

Fortunately, I'll always carry a bit of Alaska - and a lot of great memories - in my heart. When the at-work shit storm inevitably starts back up (and I expect it to do just that within days of returning), I'll have somewhere to go in my mind.